Posts Tagged ‘Meet Him’

You’ve heard it often and so have we: distance makes the heart grow fonder.

Based on our respective experiences, we’ve discovered this doesn’t always hold true – and we know why.

Relationships have four dimensions that work together to make a connection with someone else fulfilling. They are:

Intellectual

Physical

Intellectually, relationships that are long distance can fulfill this dimension through great telephone chats, emails, IMs and exchanges of information. Admiration, stimulation and love can grow in this dimension quite easily because they are centered in what you know, understand and want to share with each other. The impact of distance on this dimension is low.

Emotionally, distance can introduce some, well, distance. When one person experiences upset, frustration, fear, sadness  we want the support that sometimes only a loved one can give with hugs, kisses, hand holding, back rubbing and eye contact that reassure, comfort and remind us of the loving support right beside us. These physical gestures that provide emotional support are not possible at a distance. One could argue that talking could be emotionally supportive, and we are not discounting that. But sometimes, there are just no words. Likewise, when you are happy, get great news and have something to celebrate, you want to share these highly emotional moments with the one you love too. Emotional engagement comes from a combination of the senses of sight, sound and touch. The impact of distance on this dimension is high.

Spiritually, distance can be a nuisance but not necessarily a dealbreaker. Celebrations of holidays and a shared sense of values are all part of a couple’s spiritual life. Oftentimes but not always, couples with the same faith find spirituality an easily shared dimension because each person has grown up with similar spiritual experiences and heritage. It’s not about any one religion or necessarily about being of the same religion. It’s more focused on an openness to spirituality and interests each person has in sharing experiences in this dimension. It is rooted in respecting and supporting the spiritual fulfillment for each other. This makes for a greater relationship with more depth. The impact of distance on this dimension is medium.

Physically, distance can be difficult. The only way to deal with this dimension is to be diligent about dissolving the distance. To reach out and touch someone, without saying a word, is an irreplaceable connection. It says “I Love You” on a whole different level. Touch is a great experience for us as human beings and is an integral part of a loving, sustainable relationship. Without physical contact and presence, a relationship at a distance is doomed.

The key here is consistent contact. We feel that relationships that include in person physical contact monthly work best. Any longer than this and the distance may begin to drain the relationship.  What works even better is to decide and agree on what the longest amount of time will be for you to be apart.  It might be 10 days or two weeks.  The key is to agree as a team what is going to work for both of you.

There is also one additional aspect of physical relationships: scheduling and setting expectations. When you know when you’re going to see each other again, there is a deeper commitment to the relationship because expectations of being together are fulfilled. When there are no dates set to see each other, doubts can be cast on true commitment to the relationship. The impact of distance on this dimension is critically high.

There is one more area in long distance relationships that we feel compelled to mention that support their ultimate success. In every relationship, finances play a role. In terms of a long distance relationship, money must be considered as flying to visit one another so you can be together and grow together is a real factor for your overall success.

We suggest that you discuss financially how your long distance relationship will be supported. If you don’t, you just might find yourself stuck between your desire to be together and your dwindling dollars to support yourself and your relationship.

A relationship with someone is where we tend to grow the most as people. We find out more about ourselves and each other as a result. We learn about life through sharing it with each other.

Relationships are also a responsibility. They come with commitments, expectations, emotions and experiences you can only have when you have the courage to engage in them.

The bottomline on long distance relationships: plan to be with each other at regular intervals, the more often the better, with the intention of dissolving the distance permanently. Make sure financially you are well-positioned to support it.

We are certain that by following these simple strategies, you can find the man of your dreams and overcome the inherent challenges faced in a long distance relationship.

It’s Your Time to Have It All!

How much time do you spend each week developing and cultivating the relationship of your dreams?

Don’t have it yet?

How much time are you spending getting ready for it?

Relationships require time and attention, just like every other part of your life.  Just like a beautiful flower, you have to care for, feed and water your desire to find Mr. Right so your dream relationship can blossom and bloom.

Follow the activities in Boys Before Business to develop your dream relationship and act as if you have already met him.

What you think about, you bring about – so think about the relationship you want to build and share with him.  What would your mornings and weekends be like? How often would you talk each day? And what would you talk about?

Act as if you are already in it and the activities consistent with getting it.  When you do, it will be easier to find him, meet him and keep him.

Need more help getting ready for your dream relationship?

Schedule 60 minutes and listen to our free tele-workshop, complete with a free companion workbook.  It will help you take the First Steps to Having It All! Click Here now to enroll.

Starting a New Year is always exciting.  It is the time when you allow yourself to dream again. You make resolutions and goals and feel inspired.

Then after a week, reality sets in and it seems you are back to the grind.  Your dreams start to fade away as you get busy with daily activities. Before you know it, months have gone by and the inspiration and excitement you feel at the start of the New Year is gone.

Don’t let this happen to you!

Every day take two minutes to read your goals and visualize what achieving them feels like.  Think about the life you want to create.  Write down one action step you could do to help move you in the direction of your dreams.  In five minutes a day, you could feel that same inspiration and excitement.

Five minutes a day turns into 1,825 minutes which turns into 76 days!

Imagine what you can accomplish!

Buy from Amazon.com

Buy from Barnes & Noble

Buy now from Borders

Who said mathematics doesn’t work when it comes to love?  It’s a new year this week.  Out with the old and in with the new, right?

This is your time to clear out the experiences with dates and boyfriends past and get ready to gear up for the year you’ll meet your dream guy – this year.

Not sure it can really happen for you?
Not certain that you are ready for it?

This is the week and this is your time to believe in the dream that he is out there for you and that you are indeed ready to meet him.

When you combine your sincere belief with the power of your intent to meet him, you too will find that you are ready to put Boys Before Business to work for you.

You’ll also find that along with your new man will come better business when you put Boys Before Business.

Accept the invitations to celebrate relationships past and let them go at midnight to make room for the new man for the new you this year.

You just might find that finding Mr. Right will make you Mrs. Rich in every area of your life this year.

Yes!  It’s definitely your time to have it all!

Buy from Borders

Buy from Amazon.com

So you haven’t found him yet?
Are you thinking there is no use and all the good men are taken?
Are you wondering if it is possible to really have it all?

It is possible and we promise all the good men are not taken there is someone out there for you.  To find him, get back to basics.

Start by reviewing your Dear God Letter and make sure you are crystal clear about what you want.

Next, make sure you have a vision of what your ideal relationship looks like and feels like.  Describe to yourself what it will be like to be with the man you have described.

Believe it is possible and take action by going to new places, meeting new people, telling people who you are looking for.

Make sure your environments support what you want and make sure you have room for him – at home and at work.

Then simply detach.

We know it sounds like a contradiction: focus, focus, focus then detach.  What we mean by detach is be grateful for what you have in your life now, let go of what you want and trust that the Universe will help you.  It might not be in your exact time frame but trust you can Have it All.

Keep thinking about what you are intending to create for your romantic life.  It will happen.  It did for us and it can for you!

It’s Fashion Week!

Are you inspired by the latest fashion and are madly trying to lose weight to fit into what’s out there?

Fashion can be fun but at times it can be frustrating.

Oftentimes, while we look at the models on the runway, we start to compare ourselves to them.

The best way to enjoy fashion is to decide what you like and what looks good on you.   It is not about looking like a model. It’s about wearing a style that brings out your confidence.

Oftentimes we buy things in the hope that it will look good when we lose a few pounds.  This is crazy. It’s more rewarding to be with a man who loves you for who you are.

You can actually look like a model.  What you can learn from Fashion Week is the way the models strut.  They walk with confidence and that is sexy.  And guess what? You can strut too and look just like a model.

What men find most captivating is a woman with self-confidence.  It’s this ability to believe in oneself that is alluring, attractive and intriguing.  When we have this, any woman can strut like a model and engage the attention of men everywhere.

The fashion that fits is the one that brings forth this inner confidence so you too can act like a model in every area of your life and live the life you love.

It’s your time to have it all!

Every year at the holiday season, do you find yourself “the single girl” at the holiday parties amidst others in couples?  Wondering how many more parties you’ll be invited to where you show up as “the single girl” with or without a date?

Maybe this year we can help resolve the catch-22 of being too busy to find the man of your dreams because of your career and finding yourself all alone again with no one beside you at holiday parties and friendly gatherings of good cheer.

You still have time this Fall to find and meet the man of your dreams while working and building your amazing career.

What if you could finish the year strong in both business and your personal romantic life?  Think it can’t be done?  We know.  We were you.  Year after year, holiday after holiday all throughout the Fall.

From Halloween parties and hayrides to Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa and the New Year, stop hugging the wall this year and start finding the man of your dreams to hug instead.

It’s easier when you put “Boys Before Business.”

You’re still not too late to find him this year.

Use these 5 simple tips to get you started:

1) Make a list of the top 10 traits that you’d like in a mate.
State these in positive statements.  Use “he does,” “he likes,”,
“I like it when he…,” or “he will” statements.

2) Next, look at your calendar.  When will you make time in your
busy schedule for him?

3) Now, decide if you are willing to put “Boys Before Business”
and if you are ready to meet the man of your dreams.

4) Put forth the energy, the belief and the faith that you too can still
find him this year.

5) Believe it’s possible for you to meet him.

Regardless of what others think or say, it’s your time to have it all!

When you look at your calendar, home and activities this week and especially for this weekend, what’s the biggest priority you see?

Remember at the beginning of the year when you said that this was it – this was your year to meet the man of your dreams and have a real loving and supportive relationship?

Take an inventory of what you’ve been doing and the actions you’ve been taking to find him.

Have you:

·             Identified and defined your core values

·             Written your Dear God Letter and clearly articulated your Must Have, Would Like and Dream Traits

·             Told family and friends you are ready to be introduced to the men who match your Dear God Letter

·             Changed your activity schedule to workout when more men are at the gym or taking yoga or pilates classes

·             Set up your profile with the dating service of your choice on or offline and shared your Dear God Letter traits with them

If you haven’t been prioritizing your quest for a relationship or feel as though perhaps you thought you were prioritizing this but have found that you’re really not, now is the best time to re-evaluate, make some new choices and take different actions to make the romantic relationship you want a priority.

As we like to say, put Boys Before Business – even before you get the boy.  By putting the activities and actions around finding your dream man first, you’ll begin practicing the Boys Before Business philosophy before you meet him.  This will serve you well in the long run so you can make adjustments to your schedule now and experience the magic putting Boys Before Business creates.

If one of your greatest dreams and life experiences is to have a great romantic relationship, reprioritize your activities and put your relationship first.

You’ll get great results and discover that now really is your time to have it all!

All of the tools you have been using to find the man of your dreams can be used to have your dream career.  Write a Dear God Letter for your dream job or write one for what you want to change in your current professional life.  Get really clear about what you want.  Visualize it daily.  At the same time, clean up your office environment.  Make room for new opportunities.  The techniques you are using to find your dream man can also be used to find your dream client or dream business partner.

Boys Before Business is about putting your relationship first.  You can follow this same philosophy in business.  Put your work relationships first.  Make sure you connect with your clients and colleagues.  Keep your communication clear and stay focused on your vision.  When you go to new places to find your man, use your adventures as an opportunity to meet new people for your business as well.

Summer’s almost over.  If you still haven’t met him, there are still fun ways to find him and insightful ways to prepare yourself to meet him.

Finding him is a process.  Look at the people you’ve met.  What did you like about them?  And what would you rather change?

Evaluate each relationship and make this part of your process.  Observe and chat with couples you admire.  If you know them, talk with them about what makes their relationship great.  Whether you know them or not, notice what they do, how they interact with each other and identify what you seem attracted to in their relationship.

Are these qualities in your Dear God Letter?  What about in your vision you’ve been writing about?

Take 5 minutes each day to read your letter and visualize the relationship you want to be a part of.  This process helps you get clearer and clearer so when he does show up, you can recognize him almost instantly.  You can also describe clearly the relationship you want build with him.

Do your best to not compare yourself to other people in their relationships.  Instead, focus on you and compare yourself to how much you have grown from the last relationship and what you have learned from your own experiences.

Be honest with yourself: determine if you are moving forward or making the same mistakes.  If you find that you are re-creating the same relationship, it just may be time to do something different.

To find the right person, you have to make finding him a priority and put Boys Before Business.  It will take time and effort – and when you do, it will take you right into the arms of the man of your dreams.