Posts Tagged ‘find mr. right’

In the 80’s, we all danced around to Huey Lewis & The News singing about whether we believe in love and about the power of love taking us back to the future. Remember that? Those were the days when we were carefree, loved our boys and probably weren’t thinking much about business.

These days, maybe the opposite is true: you spend more time thinking about business and less time believing in love.

We know. Sometimes it’s hard to believe that you can still find love, but we know it’s possible… as long as you want to.

Oftentimes in the conversations we have during our workshops around the country, we find that women have lost their belief in love and feel that it’s no longer something that they can experience in their lives.

Cher has a great quote that we love: “If grass can grow through cement, love can find you at every time in your life.”

You see, finding love starts with the belief that you can find it, find him and that you deserve to have it all: boys and business.

When you believe it, you’ll see it and see it manifest right before your eyes. When you open your heart, soul and spirit to love, inevitably you will attract it and by golly, love will find you.

By keeping your eye out for the man you feel is your Mr Right and by revising and refining your Dear God Letter as you meet different candidates to determine who’s really right for you, you just may find that Huey Lewis was right when he asked, “Do you believe in love? Do you believe it’s true?”

And then you’ll find that Huey and the boys summed it up perfectly when they sang:

“They say that all in love is fair/ Yeah, but you don’t care
But you know what to do/ When it gets hold of you
And with a little help from above/ You feel the power of love
Can you feel it?”

May 2011 be your year to embrace and celebrate the power of love… Sing it, Huey!

Need help figuring out who’s really right for you? Start with our free tele-workshop where in 60 minutes we’ll help you to identify what’s really important to you in a relationship and how to write your own Dear God Letter.

This is your year for happily ever after. You have decided. The question is, are you committed? To have it all you are going to have to be committed to taking action. Finding Mr. Right is possible but you must be willing to put in the time and effort. As we have said before, go find Prince Charming instead of waiting for him at the door.

Before we help you get ready for the love of your life, we want you first to get rid of your excuses.

Top Excuses For Not Finding Mr. Right

1) I don’t have any time.
2) All the good men are taken
3) I don’t want to have to give up my career
4) I don’t know where to meet him
5) I need to lose weight first

Girls, don’t let these excuses sidetrack you from having the life you want. You may be satisfied right now with life and maybe you were like us and thinking this is as good as it gets. No more status quo in 2011! It’s time. So what can you do?

Here’s how to start:

• Determine what you want. Know what you are looking for so when you find him, you keep him. Write your Dear God letter today.
• Decide what you will give up in order to get what you want. You might have to forego watching your favorite show to go out on a blind date or skip spending time on Facebook to go on Match.com. You might have to leave work on time to go to an event.
• Associate with people who will help you get what you want. Surround yourself with people who support you and tell them what type of person you are looking for.
• Have a plan and work your plan. Join a dating service, start taking a class, schedule time to put yourself in a position to meet the right person.

Next, believe it is possible. You need to be excited about your life in love! Tom Barret says, “It is time to dust off your hope. Dust off your belief. Dust off your confidence. Dust off your determination. And it’s time to Dust off your dreams.”

Why?

Because you are either going to dust them off or cast them off. That choice will impact the direction and quality of your life for years to come.

It’s your time to have it all!

For more of our simple tips, follow us on www.twitter.com/boysb4business

Need help figuring out who’s really right for you? Start with our free tele-workshop where in 60 minutes we’ll help you to identify what’s really important to you in a relationship and how to write your own Dear God Letter.

As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “What we seek we shall find…”

When looking for Mr. Right or that right business relationship, keep in mind that you will eventually get what you are looking for. What’s most important is to be clear about what it is exactly that you are seeking.

We know that when you look for something in particular, you are seeking certain qualities and characteristics so your awareness of these traits is raised. You are more sensitive to them so you will readily pick them out when you see them.

Here’s a simple exercise to play with for a moment to understand what we mean: the next time you are in a crowded room with lots of people or you are going to a mall to shop, focus on just finding the people who are wearing red. Chances are, you will start seeing a whole bunch of people wearing red-because that’s what you are looking for and focusing on.

The interesting thing that occurs for many women is that we tend to look for a man with good looks instead of looking for a man who will love us and who we can love.

As we like to say: Don’t look for the man you can live with; look for the man you can’t live without.

Looking for a man who is tall, dark and handsome may preclude you from seeing and meeting the man you really could fall madly in love with. We know this firsthand and can attest to the benefits of looking for the qualities and traits of the man and relationship you want to have, instead of just looking for good looks alone.

In business, getting clear about the types of people you want to work with and the qualities and characteristics they possess is similar to seeking the man of your dreams. The process is the same. Using tools like the Dear God Letter are the same to clarify what you want in the professional relationships you are seeking.

The more you seek, the more you shall find.

So take the time to make the effort to clarify who it is you really want to be with. Then seek him out and build the life of your dreams with the man you love.

“It’s your time to have it all!”

Need help figuring out who’s really right for you? Start with our free tele-workshop where in 60 minutes we’ll help you to identify what’s really important to you in a relationship and how to write your own Dear God Letter.

Photo Credit: Michal Marcol / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Remember that popular scene in the movie, Jerry Maguire, when Tom Cruise’s character, Jerry, says that famous line to Renee Zellweger’s character, Dorothy,  “You…complete me,” and so many of our hearts melted as we heard it?

We’d like to hit the pause button on the DVD or BlueRay player and suggest that you take a moment to think about this:

Before you venture out to find Mr. Right, be complete with yourself.

As the new year rolls in, make a commitment to be complete with past relationships you’ve long abandoned, past jobs you’ve left behind and all the people who weren’t really supportive of you in your quest to find the right man for you. Close these out once and for all so you can regain the energy that any thoughts and feelings about these have been draining in your life.

Sweep out the old to make room for the right and bright new ones.

Now, get clear, really clear, about who your dream man is and what career you really love. Understand what is most important to you. Be certain. Be confident. Be complete with both: boys and business.

Then actively seek the life you say you want. Write it down. Use the Dear God Letter to prioritize what you absolutely must have to make it right. Make a point of reading through it every day.

Keep in mind: What you think about, you bring about.

By keeping these details at the top of your mind, you’ll tend to focus on finding what you desire, instead of what you don’t.

So when you finally say that famous follow-up line like Dorothy did in Jerry Maguire, you can say it with confidence because you know you are complete. You know what you really want. You’ll recognize him in an instant and then you’ll hear yourself say:

“You had me at hello.”

It’s your time to have it all!

Need help figuring out what’s really right for you? Start with our free tele-workshop where in 60 minutes we’ll help you to identify what’s really important to you in a relationship and how to write your own Dear God Letter.

How can another year have passed and you still haven’t met the love of your life? You might be thinking you can’t have it all and maybe you’re thinking you are just going to be satisfied with your life the way it is right now. Stop your stinkin’ thinking! There is no reason to settle for status quo when you can have it all!

There are some things you can do right now to get ready for the life of your dreams in 2011. Our new newlywed, Shawn, started her search for Mr. Right by cleaning out her closets and making room for him. That’s right, out with the old so the new can walk in. Now is the perfect time to throw out anything that you haven’t worn or used in the last year and it’s the perfect time to donate what you don’t want, to charity.

Give your home and office a once over and create environments that support your goals.

Next, decide what you want, what you truly want. One of the biggest things that can hold you back from everlasting love is you not being clear about the type of person you want to attract or what you are seeking as the next phase in your professional life. Take time to write your list of who and what you want. Use www.deargodletter.com/bbb to make it easy and fun.

Surround yourself with a visual representation of what you want in your life. Create the vision board you promised yourself you would. Gather your girlfriends together and have a vision board party. We offer a simple kit that includes everything each of you will need to complete yours. Play music, have fun and really celebrate what’s next for you. To get the kits for your party, see our BBB vision board.

As the year comes to a close, write down all of your successes for the year. Commit to doing the BBB work to find your true love in the new year and toast yourself because you are on your way to having it all!

It’s your time to have it all!

For more of our daily tips:

follow us on www.twitter.com/boysb4business and like our page on Facebook at www.facebook.com/boysbeforebusiness.

You’ve heard it often and so have we: distance makes the heart grow fonder.

Based on our respective experiences, we’ve discovered this doesn’t always hold true – and we know why.

Relationships have four dimensions that work together to make a connection with someone else fulfilling. They are:

Intellectual

Physical

Intellectually, relationships that are long distance can fulfill this dimension through great telephone chats, emails, IMs and exchanges of information. Admiration, stimulation and love can grow in this dimension quite easily because they are centered in what you know, understand and want to share with each other. The impact of distance on this dimension is low.

Emotionally, distance can introduce some, well, distance. When one person experiences upset, frustration, fear, sadness  we want the support that sometimes only a loved one can give with hugs, kisses, hand holding, back rubbing and eye contact that reassure, comfort and remind us of the loving support right beside us. These physical gestures that provide emotional support are not possible at a distance. One could argue that talking could be emotionally supportive, and we are not discounting that. But sometimes, there are just no words. Likewise, when you are happy, get great news and have something to celebrate, you want to share these highly emotional moments with the one you love too. Emotional engagement comes from a combination of the senses of sight, sound and touch. The impact of distance on this dimension is high.

Spiritually, distance can be a nuisance but not necessarily a dealbreaker. Celebrations of holidays and a shared sense of values are all part of a couple’s spiritual life. Oftentimes but not always, couples with the same faith find spirituality an easily shared dimension because each person has grown up with similar spiritual experiences and heritage. It’s not about any one religion or necessarily about being of the same religion. It’s more focused on an openness to spirituality and interests each person has in sharing experiences in this dimension. It is rooted in respecting and supporting the spiritual fulfillment for each other. This makes for a greater relationship with more depth. The impact of distance on this dimension is medium.

Physically, distance can be difficult. The only way to deal with this dimension is to be diligent about dissolving the distance. To reach out and touch someone, without saying a word, is an irreplaceable connection. It says “I Love You” on a whole different level. Touch is a great experience for us as human beings and is an integral part of a loving, sustainable relationship. Without physical contact and presence, a relationship at a distance is doomed.

The key here is consistent contact. We feel that relationships that include in person physical contact monthly work best. Any longer than this and the distance may begin to drain the relationship.  What works even better is to decide and agree on what the longest amount of time will be for you to be apart.  It might be 10 days or two weeks.  The key is to agree as a team what is going to work for both of you.

There is also one additional aspect of physical relationships: scheduling and setting expectations. When you know when you’re going to see each other again, there is a deeper commitment to the relationship because expectations of being together are fulfilled. When there are no dates set to see each other, doubts can be cast on true commitment to the relationship. The impact of distance on this dimension is critically high.

There is one more area in long distance relationships that we feel compelled to mention that support their ultimate success. In every relationship, finances play a role. In terms of a long distance relationship, money must be considered as flying to visit one another so you can be together and grow together is a real factor for your overall success.

We suggest that you discuss financially how your long distance relationship will be supported. If you don’t, you just might find yourself stuck between your desire to be together and your dwindling dollars to support yourself and your relationship.

A relationship with someone is where we tend to grow the most as people. We find out more about ourselves and each other as a result. We learn about life through sharing it with each other.

Relationships are also a responsibility. They come with commitments, expectations, emotions and experiences you can only have when you have the courage to engage in them.

The bottomline on long distance relationships: plan to be with each other at regular intervals, the more often the better, with the intention of dissolving the distance permanently. Make sure financially you are well-positioned to support it.

We are certain that by following these simple strategies, you can find the man of your dreams and overcome the inherent challenges faced in a long distance relationship.

It’s Your Time to Have It All!

Much has happened with “The Bachelorette,” Ali Fedotowsky, since our last article about her and her quest to find the man of her dreams.

In episodes 5 and 6, Ali continued to talk about her fear of not being loved back.

Isn’t this truly every woman’s fear? That she’ll put her whole heart into a relationship, allow herself to be vulnerable (maybe for the first time ever) and then boom! She won’t feel loved or supported in the relationship she invests in.

During episode 6, Justin fulfilled Ali’s greatest fear when it was revealed to her that not only did he already have a girlfriend – and a second one on the side – but he was using Ali and the show to raise his own visibility to further his own career and interest in getting into acting. Funny enough, his own girlfriend was the one that outted him.

Any woman would be devastated by this situation – and many women have been. Like Ali, they have lost their faith in men and have doubts that Mr. Right could really exist.

For Ali, the way Justin handled the news of her discovery when she confronted him with this made the situation even worse.

We give Ali a lot of credit as she winds her way through the variety of experiences women face when they truly want to find the dream man that they can really build an amazing life with.

To her credit, Ali opened her heart back up during this same episode during her date with Ty and made it possible for her to fall in love again instead of just rejecting the other guys because of her experience with Justin.

At the end of episode 6, Ali talked again about her fears with Frank and about not being able to control who falls in love with her and who she falls in love with. Frank even talked about being cautious himself and why he’s still single at 30. He said that he himself hasn’t settled and that he only wants to get married once.

That’s all rather odd coming from Frank who did receive a rose and went on to welcome Ali to his hometown in episode 8 where she met his family along with meetings Roberto’s, Kirk’s and Chris’s families too. The reason it’s all odd about Frank is because in the coming attractions for episode 9, it is revealed that Frank is actually still in love with his ex-girlfriend who wants him back and says she wants him to “come home.”

Instead of jumping eagerly on a plane promptly to go to Tahiti to meet Ali for the next round of “The Bachelorette” with her, Frank heads off to his ex-girlfriend’s apartment in his hometown of Chicago to figure out his own feelings before he takes the next steps with Ali.

As women, we have to give Ali credit. She’s living through many of the fears we go through when seeking the man of our dreams. Some women give up after a while, throw in the towel and turn to their computers and careers instead and figure if love really does exist for them, it will find them while they are living their lives and fulfilling their other dreams.

Not Ali. Even in the face of men continuing to profess their interest in being the man of her dreams while having girlfriends on the side and her taking the steps to travel to meet each man left standing in their own hometowns along with their families, Ali is still standing strong and remains committed to taking the steps needed to find the real man of
her dreams.

We want to know what’s holding you back from finding yours. Answer our poll this month and tell us what scares you most about finding your own Mr. Right. Click here to
answer the poll: http://bit.ly/aoTUIo.

We’ll keep watching Ali as she heads off to Tahiti with her big heart and possibly for a big heartbreak from Frank.

As she continues on her journey to meet her man and make her dreams come true, we know that she’ll reap the rewards she deserves of getting the boy and building the business she’s dreamed of.

It’s Your Time to Have It All!

Last year on ABC’s hit show The Bachelor, audiences were disappointed when one of their favorite women, Ali Fedotowsky, left the show because her job was calling.

At the time, Ali told Jake that although she was falling in love with him, she couldn’t stay.  She picked her career over the possibility of love.

Fast forward to this season’s The Bachelorette and we find a wiser Ali who is back.

According to ABC online they say, “This time, love not work, is number one on her agenda.

“I definitely have a lot of regret,” she says of her decision to leave Jake Pavelka to return to her job — one she’s now quit! “I’m ready to move forward,” she swears. “Bring on those boys. I’m excited.”

She’s hoping her journey will end “with tears in my eyes and I’m looking at a man down on one knee, asking me to be his wife.”

During the first episode, Ali talks about her decision and admits she made the wrong choice. She says she won’t make that mistake again and that she is making finding true love her priority.

She now realizes the importance of putting relationships first. Those 25 men who are vying for her love can rest assured that her priorities are in order and that she will be making them number one.

Our guess is once she decides on her dream man, she will soar even higher in her career.

See for yourself.

http://abc.go.com/shows/the-bachelorette/episode-guide/episode-1/441529

Finding the man of your dreams can sometimes feel like a daunting task.

Sometimes it seems just easier to stay home and be satisfied with what you have.

What we know for sure is you deserve more and can have more!  Charles Schwab said, “A man can succeed at almost anything for which he has unlimited enthusiasm.” He’s right!

With enthusiasm you can accomplish anything.  To help you find your inner excitement and enthusiasm for finding the man of your dreams, enroll people to support you who are also on a mission to Have It All.  When you surround yourself with like-minded people, there is an amazing energy and force that can help you get results faster!

If those people aren’t in your life yet, you can find them in our Club BBB – our exclusive membership community where the women-only members offer support and excitement to each other. They can feel they are closer and closer every day to finding and keeping the man of their dreams by receiving the same new information through Club BBB, having someone to talk to who also feel this is important and getting access to resources that make it easier to connect with those people who think like you do.

When you are with like-minded people, finding true love is less daunting and much more fun.

To learn more about Club BBB, how you can enroll as a member and find your like-minded accountability, go to http://www.boysbeforebusiness.com/membership.html.

Join with a friend!  It’s even more fun.

It’s Your Time to Have It All!

As the seasons change, take time to think about your past relationships.  People come into your life for seasons, reasons and for lifetimes.

Notice if there is a common denominator and highlight all the positive aspects of each relationship.

Finding Mr. Right is possible when you let go of boyfriends past and take action to meet someone new.

Take that leap of faith and break down any wall you might have built to protect you from getting hurt.  In the journey to find love, you have to put yourself out there and believe you can find him.

As we get older, we sometimes forget to let our guard down so we can let someone walk in.  If you want that happily ever after and true love, then you must be ready and willing to accept it.

You never know if the next person you meet is for a season or a reason, or if he’s the one for a lifetime.

“It’s Your Time to Have It All!”

Kim and Jen