Archive for November, 2009

After Thanksgiving, the holiday spirit really kicks up a notch.  Couples are more visible – at parties, out shopping in the stores and going from family to friends to office holiday parties.  If you are one of those who want to be in a couple but aren’t yet, take a few hints this season from the happy couples you see.

What is it about them that you admire?  Are they affectionate?  Do you like the way they communicate and laugh with one another?  Maybe it’s the way they hold hands or how he’s always the gentleman who opens the door for her and offers a hand to help her out of the car?

When you hear yourself say: “I wish I had someone like that who was with me,” write down whatever it is that strikes a chord with you.  This is a great insight into what kind of relationship you desire.  These little details make a big difference for the couple you are noticing – and also in the relationship that you want to build.

Think about the small stuff that makes a difference for you.  What makes you feel supported?  What makes you feel loved?  What provides you with that inner feeling of being appreciated?  Write these all down as you can identify them.  This is the information you’ll want to share with your Mr. Right when you meet him.  These are the exact pieces of the puzzle that make it easy for him to be Mr. Right.

Make your wish list and believe in it.  This is your season to have your dream come true.

It’s your time to have it all!

Although you may not have found love in your romantic relationship yet, you may have cherished relationships with other people in your life: family, best friends, business colleagues and others.

There are probably some common qualities about these relationships that make them feel special, deep and wonderful.  Take a moment to think about what makes these different.  Why do they make you feel good?  When you have great news to share, who do you want to call first?  Why?

The qualities and characteristics of these important, trusted relationships are more than likely to be clues about what you’d like to experience in your romantic relationship with Mr. Right.  They can help you determine what’s valuable for you in a loving, supportive, fun and long-lasting relationship.

If you’ve been looking for Mr. Right and have continually settled for Mr. Not Quite Good Enough, take the time to recognize what factors contribute to a great relationship for you.  It’s different for everyone.  You have all the helpful hints you need, hidden right there in your other meaningful relationships.

Have you ever heard the quote: “Today is a gift, that’s why they call it the Present?”  We like to think that your present relationships are also gifts.

Use these gifts to discover the best path to Mr. Right for you.

After all, it’s your time to have it all, isn’t it?

We all have had good relationships and bad ones.  Sometimes we keep dating the same guy over and over and wonder why we haven’t found love.

Take a look at the relationships you have that brought you happiness and write down a list of what worked best for you.  Look at the relationships that had your spinning and write down what didn’t work.  This is a good exercise to help you get clear about what you really want.

Review your list and then think about what you are grateful for when it comes to these relationships.  When you can look at each relationship, be objective and find what you are grateful for in each person.  Then you can start to understand why some of your relationships worked and others didn’t. Gratitude might be hard when you are thinking of the guy that broke your heart but really think about something good that came from the relationship.

The more you understand each relationship and your own patterns the easier it will be to find Mr. Right. Gratitude might be harder to feel when you are thinking of the guy that broke your heart, but really think about it.  Be grateful for the relationship you had and what you learned about yourself that you can now apply to the next relationship.

Sometimes the road to “happily ever after” is filled with a few bumps.  The more you learn from each relationship, the smoother your journey will be to finding the man of your dreams.

It’s your time to have it all, isn’t it?

The thought of dating can be an overwhelming idea.

You know you want to meet the man of your dreams but where are you going to go to find someone who matches your core values and interests?  Sometimes it just seems easier to hang with your friends then bother with finding Mr. Right.  What if looking for Prince Charming really was easy and fun and it was worth the effort?

What would you be willing to do to get what you want?

To have it all, you will need to do some ground work so why not make it fun!  Start by taking that class that you have always been wanting to, join a new club or go to some place new.  Make finding him an adventure.  Create a list of all the things you have been saying you want  to do and start checking them off your list.  Journal about your adventures. And while you’re doing all the things on your “bucket” list, you just might find him.

Ever hear those stories about women who just meet someone in a parking lot, in line at the bookstore or online and they just click and fall in love?  So often we hear from these women that they just let go of the idea of what Mr. Right looked like and what he had to be like for them and turned their focus on themselves.

All of those ideas you have about the perfect guy for you – his looks, occupation and everything you decided would be just perfect for you – we suggest you let go of them.  If you think of the tall, dark and handsome guy, you may just miss the Mr. Right for you who isn’t tall, has light or no hair and is still handsome nonetheless.

Focus on the relationship you want to have and who you want to be in it.  What will you and your man be doing?  Where will you travel?  What romantic getaway will you be running away to for the weekend?  Will you be hiking in the mountains or swimming in the ocean?  What kind of restaurant will you be toasting in as you celebrate your romance?

Too often when we are looking for Mr. Right, we concentrate so heavily on what he’s going to be like that we get attached to him before we’ve even met him and forget what we’re going be like when we meet him.

Perhaps by holding fast to an ideal look for your Mr. Right, maybe you’ve been sheltering yourself from the real relationship you say you want.  Check this out in your own world.  When you make something so perfect that it’s seemingly impossible to find, you may use this as a mechanism to protect yourself from getting what you say you really want.

In fact, for some women, actually finding Mr. Right is a shocking thought because … what if he really does exist?  What will happen to the lifestyle you know now and perhaps love?

Let go of all the preconceived notions you have about him and how he’ll affect your life.

Enjoy the journey of finding out who you want to be in the relationship you’ve dreamed of.

Set yourself up for the successful relationship you want by getting clear about you and what you want.

Know that you can have it all – the fabulous career and the great romance.

And just let go.

Isn’t now your time to have it all?